Isn’t it hilarious when writers complain about putting their stories they’ve spent at least a year on into a single sentence that’s supposed sell it? I think so and I’m one of those writers. Sometimes I feel I spend more time on that one sentence aka Logline, than my book or screenplay. But, that sentence is more important than your project and you know why: it sells your project.
Everyone has their own way of writing a logline and so many of us don’t have the foggiest idea how to do it effectively. In fact, it’s mind-boggling to sift through all the different ways screenwriters, consultants, etc. suggest you write one and I suggest you research and read everybody’s suggestions. One might click for you.
The most common logline suggestion or rule I found was that your concept must be easy to express in a single sentence. Single sentence? Definitely. Easy? I don’t think so.
As most of you know, your logline must include your protagonist, his/her goal, and the obstacle/conflict to overcome – the antagonist. The essentials. But where’s the beef?
Writing rules seem to change all the time. The majority of writing teachers emphasize starting your logline with your protagonist preceded by an adjective, i.e., A burned-out lawyer, A paranoid tiger, a disabled carnival barker. I’ve always supported this format but, while doing so, it nagged at me. Why? I realized this was not a unique format, at least for me. I was bored with my loglines and, if you’re bored with your own stuff, it’ll be boring to others.
Some suggest starting with the word “After”: After a paranoid rat discovers…then something happens. Nope. Not for me. Too common. Something else that’s commonly used in a logline is the phrase “…only to find out that” or “…only to learn (or discover) that”. I’d avoid those, too.
Okay. Here’s the disclaimer. One logline format may work for you and not others and not all loglines need to follow the same format for each project.
I want a vibrant, energetic, compelling logline and found I wasn’t getting it with the above formats. Then I read a book: THE VISUAL MINDSCAPE OF THE SCREENPLAY by screenwriter Bill Boyle (available on Amazon). I don’t recommend books unless I feel they are exceptional and this one is, especially his take on Loglines in Chapter 15 titled The Kinetic Logline.
Bill Boyle studied hundreds of loglines and researched why he got excited about only a few of them. Here are four of his points that stood out for me regarding the loglines he liked:
-“…they expressed a sense of kinetic action in the way they revealed their story. They hit the ground running by beginning with an action verb.”
-“They also drew me into their story by expressing through a descriptive adverb the inciting incident and their character’s fatal flaw.”
-“Each logline ended with a realization of sorts. It was either a realization on the part of the protagonist’s Inner Journey or a realization of discovery on the part of the reader.”
-“A great example of this is the logline for The Full Monty:
Driven by financial despair six unemployed steel workers become strippers to make ends meet and, in doing so, find their own self worth.”
Mr. Boyle explains why this logline is so great: “It begins with an action verb that sets the logline in active mode right from the outset; a kinetic energy is in place. It follows with a descriptive adverb that describes the fatal flaw and inciting incident. It includes the inner and outer journey and ends with a realization.” Then he breaks it down in his easy to use Kinetic Log Line Template.
That logline format clicked for me. It includes it all as a logline should. It excites me and it will excite a buyer. Find one that excites you.
